dude i'm inner monologue high
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
