I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
