FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
so let's talk penis.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
