I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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