It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
