everyone is single if you try hard enough
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
