just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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