At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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