You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
A bitchslap is in order.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
