i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
