I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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