STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
