But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
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