i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I think people are normalizing furries
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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