I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I want you more than these girls want KFC
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
