Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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