we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
