how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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