Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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