dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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