I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
