I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
