"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
