never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize