he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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