So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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