I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
You were trust falling into bushes
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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