new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize