Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
