I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Is it because I queefed?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
