i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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