went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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