Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize