Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
