so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Randomize
