He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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