just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
