she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize
