Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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