When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
