hotel room ftw
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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