I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
