god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
