Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize