I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Randomize
