East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize