There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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