Have you finally orgasmed yet?
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
