My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
