marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize